Sunday, April 29, 2012

Daddy talk: Bucket lists

Things are great right now. Milo's being fussy and cries in frustration because he can't articulate what he wants. I can understand that, well at least the frustration part. He gets a little better at it each day. So far we know when he's thirsty, when he wants food, when he wants more. I am sure to him we aren't doing a great job but we are getting some level of understanding. Lots more to look forward to.

Yesterday we did a practice 10K run/walk and took a break at Gossage Youth Sports Park while some little league games were going on. I couldn't help but imagine Milo playing ball, to the point where I planned on getting him that padded shirt in case he gets hit with a ball. It isn't all that odd to imagine what kinds of things he will get into and what to pad his world with so he doesn't get hurt. I think that's the easy thing to do is to figure out all the things he will do.

One thing I have never contemplated are the things that he wouldn't be able to do. I ran across a story on CNN about the daughter of Mike and Laura Canahuati. Her name is Avery and has only 2 years to live. Her parents have come up with a bucket list for her and are working on getting as many of those items done for her. I know how stuck I would be just trying to understand why my perfect little child doesn't get to see his third birthday. I hope that Avery gets to do so many things and see so many places. I hope the same for Milo.

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Reading is fundamental

With parties, doctor's appointments and chasing a newly minted toddler around, I have been quite lax with my duties as a blogger. So, until I can gather my thoughts to write a good blog post (or coerce the S.O. into writing a Daddy Talk post), I give you the cute:

Daddy and Milo reading Milo's favorite book

Monday, April 16, 2012

1 year

Dear Milo,

You are snoozing away right now, after a full weekend with parties and friends and cake. Then you had another long day today.

You spent the first part of the last month getting over a nasty infection. Despite that, you have changed so much. You now walk everywhere.

You have started saying, "All done" and signing "milk" in context. You aren't a baby anymore. You are such a big boy. You aren't content to just sit around -- whether it's at home or in stores. When we have to go shopping, you'd rather push the cart than sit in it.

You're such a little flirt. You are now much friendlier with everybody, even though you still don't much like other people holding you.

You make me laugh every day. I wish I could bottle your giggles for a rainy day. You are so sweet and make me feel like I'm the greatest thing since sliced bed. You light up when you see me, and it makes me melt.

We had such a good time celebrating your birthday. We had a party at The Little Gym because you love it there so much. It makes me smile just to see how happy you get doing simple things.

Bubbles and balls are some of your favorite things.

I'm pretty sure you knew the day was all about you.

This past year has been the most amazing, exhilarating, exhausting, joyous, life-affirming 12 months I've ever experienced. For every frustration, there are at least a dozen things that make me thankful beyond words that I'm your mommy. You are the greatest blessing of my life. I wouldn't trade one second of the past year for anything in the world.

Happy birthday, my little miracle man. I love you beyond measure.



Daddy talk: Birthday party edition

I had been debating on whether or not to invite my mom to the kiddie portion of our planned 1st birthday party at The Little Gym. My mom tends to be a clean freak that likes to monopolize the time with the boy and not let him have fun. I had been debating it a lot and decided to just invite her. I did do it the day before as she was already invited to the other 1st party at the house.

Anyhow, I called her up the Saturday before and asked if she wanted to come. She said she couldn't come because my brother wouldn't get off until 2 p.m. that day. I said no problem, I would pick her up and my brother could take her back home. Back and forth we went, finally she said she'd give my brother a call to figure out the details and that she would call back. She never did. 

I figured she wasn't into the idea of The Little Gym, which really wasn't a terrible thing. It wasn't terrible until 5 O'clock rolled around. By that time we were an hour into the second party and my mother and brother were a no show. I gave her a call and she promptly answered. My first question is are you coming to Milo's birthday party?  She said yes, then I told her again that it was on Sunday, actually my words were that the party was right now. She was surprised, thinking that the party was on his actual birthday. Same story with my brother. My brother had been in the loop on both parties for weeks now. Either way my family who lives in town were a no show to my son's first birthday while Pam's aunt came all the way from Manhattan, KS.

Anyway, I know the boy won't remember and I will not be seething over it long term but there will never be any pictures of my family at his birthday parties. Sucks a bit.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Daddy Talk: Separation anxiety

Today wasn't the first time I had to leave my family for work. But this one seems to be the most difficult. Every day this little guy gets more and more interesting and I get so easily impressed with his accomplishments.

Right now it's the walking that's doing it for me. I get so happy when he grabs my two fingers and grabs a pair of his moms and we walk hand in hand. Pretty soon he will shed our fingers to make his own way without parents in tow. I doubt that it'll happen in the week that I am gone, but it's a week I lose with him.

That being said, it's only a week. Some of our friends have had to spend months at a time away from their kids. I know that when I was young, my dad was gone for a year at a time to Germany and Korea while in the army. I am not sure how it affected me. I'm sure it wasn't great. I remember lots of fighting with my mom as she kept the family together. Army wives are some of the toughest.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Friday flashback

My little bunny, last Easter, just a few days old.

My little bunny, this year, squeezed into the same hat. Such a big boy.

Monday, April 2, 2012

Cesaren Awareness Month

April is Cesarean Awareness Month. I didn't plan to have a C-section when I gave birth to Milo. I didn't want to have a C-section. And I'm pretty sure the doctor's decision to perform one was not made lightly. But in the end, Milo was facing the wrong direction and was starting to show signs of distress. Today, Milo is healthy and happy, and I don't regret the way he entered this world. But I sure wouldn't have chosen a C-section if he would have cooperated.

I have only had one baby so I don't have experience with a vaginal birth. But considering the fact that a woman's body is designed to push a baby out that way, I'm thinking it has to be easier in the long run. Maybe it isn't easier right at that moment, but recovery has to be worlds easier.

With a C-section, I didn't get to start exercising for a couple months after I gave birth. I still experience pain at my incision site. (I almost typed "at the sight of my incision." Which is also true.) I didn't get to hold my baby until he was a few hours old. In fact, I barely got to touch him right after his birth. Rolling into recovery without the S.O. at my side was scary. Rolling into recovery without my baby was sad and lonely.

If I ever decide to have a second child, I will try harder to prevent having a C-section. Here are five ways to avoid one, from (click the link for full details):
  1. Select your care provider wisely.
  2. Get educated about labor and birth.
  3. Avoid induction of labor.
  4. Use medications and interventions wisely.
  5. Bring support for labor.
It's certainly better to not have a C-section if it can be avoided. Still, I wouldn't change a thing if it meant not having this gorgeous, silly face to look at.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Daddy Talk: Scrapes and bruises

Your son is not an action figure.

That's the lesson I learned today when taking the boy to the park. It happened in slow motion but I still didn't have time to grab him before the trike turned over. As the boy was crying, I thought he was just scared and poo pooed Pam when she rushed to pick him up. Then I saw the bump on his head and realized I am a really bad dad. It was a superficial scrape on his head and he really was more scared than anything but it still bothered me that I was too slow to grab him before he hit the ground.

I know things happen and things will happen without much control and this is just a taste. That's little conciliation when one of those things happen and you were a part of it or at least a contributing factor.