I've recently gone through the whole, "would your rather" exercise. In this case it was would you rather change any thing in the past and not be a dad. The thing stemmed from running into half of the couple that introduced us. Right now they are going through some marital troubles and are trying to work through them. One of their problems was one half looking forward to becoming a parent and the other half not.
I have a big bias because of Milo. I can't imagine changing any decision at any level that would have kept me from being a father to my son. I have gone through the requisite number of breakups and even a failed marriage.
At one time or another I went through the hemming and hawing on those relationships failing -- even some of my decisions as far as career or other opportunities. Everything I have failed or succeeded at has brought me to this moment. I wouldn't consider taking another shot at those failures and be anywhere but here. And that's what I want to say to our friend.
Being a parent has been the single, brightest part of my life and nothing compares to it. I haven't had a day of regret with this opportunity to do my best as a parent.
I can't put myself in his shoes or in good conscious tell this person he'd be better off leaving his wife. But for me it was all worth it and I don't look back at would could have been. My life has turned into a stupid Garth Brooks song and I like it.
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