Daddy Talk: Family

I don't like my mother. There I said it. I love her, but I don't like her.

I moved my family in with my mother this past summer. I sold my house faster than expected with the plans to move into a job in Longmont or Oregon. Suffice it to say that I didn't get the job but pressed on with the house sale figuring it was time to get out of the neighborhood anyway and establish roots in a house for my family. I thought that it would be a good opportunity for Milo to bond with his grandmother because she really didn't come around, maybe five times in the two years of his life.  She did get a chance to spend more time with him but none of it turned out how I wanted. It was six months of staying with her and maybe a total of one month of good.

Some things I learned from this whole escapade was that sometimes crazy is just crazy. My mom has been unstable since as far back as I can remember. As long as I can remember she had bouts of manic behavior. Really happy in one instance and boatloads of angry and crazy in another. I always wished for some different behavior and continuously was surprised that the same old thing happened over and over. I was unlucky enough to have that growing up and I don't know why I wanted Milo to go through that.

I think my bonds with Pam and my family have improved because of this.

There were definitely hard times and angry words between us all but I hope we are all better now. What I really wanted was a family, a normal family. I love my aunts and uncles because they are a bond to my dad. I love the family that it all entails. I also love the family that Pam brings.

A Month of Gratitude: Day 30

I am grateful for all my blessings and a chance to count them. It's easy to forget how good I have it. Life can get stressful. Life can be hard -- even in the best of situations. But things can always be worse. Many people have suffered great losses in the past year -- to natural disasters, to unnatural circumstances and to just plain old bad luck. I know that I am lucky to have the things I have. I am especially lucky to have people in my life that would support me and help me if I lost those things.

This exercise of a month of gratitude has really made me see how wonderful my life is. I need to carry this feeling forward throughout the new year and beyond.

A Month of Gratitude: Day 29

I am grateful for a wonderful Thanksgiving.

The food was good -- always grateful for someone else cooking. The food was plentiful -- grateful that we always have enough to eat. The company was good -- always grateful for the love of my family.

And the faces were silly. I'm always grateful for laughter.

A Month of Gratitude: Day 28

Happy Thanksgiving!

I am grateful for my family. We're a little bit of a mixed bunch and we've had some losses that hurt pretty badly. But also some recent additions that have brought a lot of happiness.

Maybe becoming a mom myself has made me appreciate my family a lot more. Whatever the reason, I'm glad that I have gotten closer to them. I can't imagine not having these wonderful people to spend the holiday with.

A Month of Gratitude: Day 27

I am grateful for rest. I am grateful for relaxing days filled with laughter and the people I love. I am grateful for deep, restful nights in a comfortable place.

This picture has nothing to do with rest. It's just a cute smile.

I am grateful for a restful visit with my family. They are totally worth the long drive.

A Month of Gratitude: Day 26

I am grateful for helpful people -- whether they are friends, family or strangers.

There is plenty of ugliness in the world, so I really appreciate people who go out of their way to be nice. It may sound overly simple, but it seems like it's easier for a lot of people to be mean or at least indifferent.

From little gestures like a warm smile or holding the door to really big favors and gifts, there's nothing quite like true kindness.

A Month of Gratitude: Days 24 and 25

We’ve been on the road for the past couple of days. I am grateful for hotels with indoor pools. Milo loves the water. We need to get him some swimming lessons again. He took lessons way back when he was 9 months old, but I don’t think he remembers anything from that time. He’s confident in the water but can’t really get the hang of floating or swimming. But he sure has fun trying.