It's Not a Competition

Sometimes I have to remind myself not to compare me or Milo to other people. I see kids about his age already potty-trained and I start worrying that he should be potty trained. Yet, I've heard and read from multiple sources that forcing potty training usually leads to set-backs. (Not that I'm saying those other parents forced it, just that I would be forcing it right now because Milo is definitely not ready.)

I have to remind myself that every kid is different and while there are milestones that probably should be met by a certain age, some kids reach them earlier and some later. Milo is taller than some older kids. He was big when he was a baby. I remember our first few visits to The Little Gym, wondering why the other kids could sit up by themselves and Milo couldn't. It was because he was two or three months younger than those kids but the same size. He's no giant but he's in the 75th percentile for height. So, he's above average.

But there I go again, comparing him to other kids.

And no one compares to my little cowboy in my eyes

He's smart and bright and funny. He's adorable. He's trying out new words and new skills all the time. I don't worry that he isn't progressing "normally." So, when I find myself comparing him to other kids -- and wondering about my parenting skills -- I have to remember that it's not a race. And I have to cherish every age and every stage. Because it's going by way (way, way, way) too quickly.

Friday Flashback

Milo's first birthday party. His second birthday party is this weekend. Where did this year go?

Daddy Talk: New Year

New Year and new things. Everyday I look forward to waking up and seeing what that kid does. He jumps by leaps and bounds, sometimes it's nothing, sometimes so much. It's funny how I don't notice things unless I look back on pictures and try to remember that this little guy was once so little and wasn't as accomplished as he is today. I look back on pictures from last Christmas and see how much he changed over this last year and I'm astonished. Everyday he changes and I lose track of how different he is from day to day.

It's exciting to see the changes, mostly I look forward to what happens to us next. I really look forward to the new things he will do. It's exciting, especially when I think about how it's new for him just like it's new to me.

20 months

Dear Milo,

Another month has passed -- another month closer to your second birthday. Time really does fly when you're having fun. And you are so much fun. You think you can read and count already, saying "I, o, i, o" or "Nine, nine, nine" when you see letters or numbers. It's quite cute and makes me feel proud, even if you're not actually reading or counting. Your vocabulary seems to expand daily, and you often say things we didn't know you knew. The other day you said, "Penguin" -- to our surprise.

We spent Thanksgiving with your Great-Aunt Dianna. We took you to the zoo there on a breezy day. You enjoyed it but didn't want us to carry you, despite the rough ground and your lack of coordination that day. Some days you seem so sure-footed while other days you seem to fall over for no reason at all. That day at the zoo, you were Mr. Clumsy but acted like you thought you were a little mountain goat. You have more will than skill some days and that can make me really nervous. I do not want to make another trip to the ER.

We also went to the Cheyenne Mountain Zoo here at home for a stroller safari -- a behind-the-scenes adventure. We got up close and personal with the resident moose. We even got to feed him crackers. You were a little timid about the moose's mouth, and I can't blame you.

Look at that nose!

We're fast approaching your second Christmas. We took you to cut a tree. You were fascinated by the alpacas at the tree farm and wanted to play in the dirt. The trees, however, didn't really keep your attention. You tried to help Daddy hang lights, and the hand-made ornaments from your grandma drew your attention.

I feel like I have to mention the shooting in a Connecticut elementary school that happened earlier this week. A man walked into a school and killed many people. It was a senseless act perpetrated by a sick individual. I don't want to dwell on it, but I mention it because it makes me want to hold you close and never let you go. It also makes me realize that no matter what I do and how much I want to protect you, I can't always be there. I hope that nothing like this ever happens to us -- or that you ever have to be a witness to such evil. But that's all I can really do -- wish and hope for the best for you. Always.

I love you, little man. You make every day better.

Love, 
Mommy

18 months

Dear Milo,

You are a year and a half old now. Can you believe it? In just the past couple of days, you have been acting like such a big boy. Maybe it's because your Great-Aunt Dianna is here to visit you. Maybe it's because you really are a big boy now. Whatever the reason, you have started surprising me by doing things like repeating words when I ask you to. You are saying new things almost daily. Just today you said "apple" and tried to say "whistle." I still can't get you to say "mommy" though.

You are doing things at The Little Gym that we've been trying to get you to do for a long time. All of a sudden, you are hanging from the bars. You are climbing on things and balancing. You are doing those things and others without prompting and without help. I'm so proud of you sometimes I almost cry. And not just because of what you do at The Little Gym.

You are so much fun to be around. You love getting out and doing things. You are practically fearless, and that can be scary for Mommy. Today, you climbed the jungle gym and went down the slide with almost no help at all.

There are some things that I'm not thrilled with -- you biting me the other night is one. But I do love when you grab me and give me big hugs. And I love when you kiss me. You can be so sweet. Most of the time. You're less consistent with your napping right now and sometimes you get cranky from lack of sleep. And you have a whole bunch of molars coming in, so I guess you're allowed to be a little angry once in awhile.

You can be quite demanding when you want something, including wanting Daddy and me to dance with you when a favorite song comes on. But it's worth it to see you smile and hear you laugh. Your laugh is the absolute best. I wish I could bottle it to use when I'm having a bad day.

Even when you're testing limits and my patience, you amaze me. You thrill me daily. Some days, I still can't believe I'm your mom.  I know you're not technically a baby anymore, but you'll always be my baby. You make me so happy. I love you like crazy, little man.

Love,
Mommy

17 Months

Dear Milo,

Another month has zipped by and like every month since you joined our family, it was awesome. You are becoming quite the little boy.

 
You continue to test your independence, which usually involves you climbing on something you shouldn't be on or running somewhere you don't need to be. But you still need my help for plenty of things.

Like getting dressed and putting on shoes and socks

That means you try to communicate more to let me know what you need. Your sign language skills are improving (you have started saying "thank you" and "help" in the past couple of weeks) and you are working on saying new words all the time.

You know animal sounds, like cow, sheep, dog and monkey. And just tonight when I asked you what a train says, you said, "Choo choo." I have to admit though, I'm not thrilled with the fact that when asked, "Where's Mama?" you point to yourself.

Such fun!

You've become very expressive. And you just started blowing kisses this week, and it's the cutest thing ever. It's hard to believe you can continue to get cuter and cuter ever single day.

Being cute with Daddy

We've been trying to get out more with you. We've gone hiking and to the park and just today we went to the apple orchard with you. You love getting out and exploring.

Yummy apple

It amazes me that I can continue to be amazed by you. Every day with you gets better and better. I love you more today than the day you were born. If someone had told me that day I could love you more, I would have said it wasn't possible; my heart would surely burst. But I do love you more. And I'll love you more tomorrow. One day you will probably be embarrassed by my displays of affection and my expressions of love. But I'm not going to stop. So get used to it.

 

I love you so much my beautiful boy.

Love,

Mommy

16 months

Dear Milo,

Another month has come and gone -- another month filled with excitement and some truly scary moments. Just this weekend, you made your first visit to the ER. You were pretty much unfazed by the entire episode. Your Daddy and I are still reeling from it. You were back to your old self the very next morning, trying to give me love headbutts and giggling like mad.

Our other big milestone this past month is that you are finally and completely weaned. One morning you got up and instead of asking for Mommy, you asked for yogurt. And we haven't looked back. Honestly, sweetie, I don't miss it. I don't get to hold you as much but I can live with that.

We were both sick this month, you for a couple of days and me for a couple weeks. That kind of threw off our normal schedule, and we're still working to get back into a routine. We hung out at the pool a few times with friends and you loved it. So much that you tried to go into the "deep" end on your own. I tried really hard not to freak out about it.

In other news, we got a new roof on the house and we got air conditioning installed. Both have helped us all sleep better.

We tried to take you to see the president when he spoke in town, but we arrived too late to get in. We missed out on that but we took you to the park, and you got to see a real-live train go by. You were fascinated by it.

So much has happened this past month, I'm having a hard time remembering it all. You seem to be constantly hungry so I expect a big growth spurt soon. Your feet are growing fast so maybe you'll soon catch up to them. I think it's part of the reason you seem clumsier than before. And maybe that contributed to your unfortunate fall.

Your personality is bursting. You are funny and sweet and sometimes a humongous little bit of a brat. You're definitely all boy, with your interest in trucks and trains and dinosaurs. You're awesome, even when you are exhibiting signs of entering the terrible twos. Sometimes I'm not as patient as I'd like be but I love you through it all. Mostly because you're so incredibly, undeniably cute.

Love,

Mommy

13 months

Dear Milo,

You sure have been enjoying life as a toddler. Now that you're a 1-year-old, you seem to believe the world is your oyster. You are Mr. Adventuresome and you're not content to stay in any one place for very long and you're quick to let me know when you're ready to move on.

You got your hair cut this past month and now you look like a real little boy instead of a baby. And I'm not the only one to say so. The instructors and moms at The Little Gym were all quite impressed with how grown up you look. And it's not just how you look, you are behaving more grown up. At least most of the time.

You have started trying to feed yourself with a fork or spoon, with some success.

Sometimes with a little less success, but you are so cute in everything you do. Whether it's hanging out with stuffed friends,

trying out new toys,

or hanging out with Daddy while I ran a 9.9-kilometer race on Mother's Day.

You and Daddy had fun together, waiting for me and my friend to finish the race. The best part of the race for me was to see how your face lit up when you saw me toward the finish line.

This month has been a whirlwind. I can't believe your first birthday came and went so quickly. Suddenly your 13 months old and such a big boy. You keep changing every day. You keep amazing me with your winning personality, your beautiful face and how much you love me. You give the best kisses and hugs.

I know I say it all the time, but you do amaze me. And I love you more than words can say.

I love you, my perfect little man.

Love,
Mommy

1 year

Dear Milo,

You are snoozing away right now, after a full weekend with parties and friends and cake. Then you had another long day today.

You spent the first part of the last month getting over a nasty infection. Despite that, you have changed so much. You now walk everywhere.

You have started saying, "All done" and signing "milk" in context. You aren't a baby anymore. You are such a big boy. You aren't content to just sit around -- whether it's at home or in stores. When we have to go shopping, you'd rather push the cart than sit in it.

You're such a little flirt. You are now much friendlier with everybody, even though you still don't much like other people holding you.

You make me laugh every day. I wish I could bottle your giggles for a rainy day. You are so sweet and make me feel like I'm the greatest thing since sliced bed. You light up when you see me, and it makes me melt.

We had such a good time celebrating your birthday. We had a party at The Little Gym because you love it there so much. It makes me smile just to see how happy you get doing simple things.

Bubbles and balls are some of your favorite things.

I'm pretty sure you knew the day was all about you.

This past year has been the most amazing, exhilarating, exhausting, joyous, life-affirming 12 months I've ever experienced. For every frustration, there are at least a dozen things that make me thankful beyond words that I'm your mommy. You are the greatest blessing of my life. I wouldn't trade one second of the past year for anything in the world.

Happy birthday, my little miracle man. I love you beyond measure.

Love,

Mommy

Saturday Smiles

Milo took a few steps all by himself this afternoon. Because I don't want to experience his entire life through a camera's viewfinder, I don't have a picture of that. I do, however, have a picture of how proud he was of his accomplishment.

Big smile!

10 Months

Dear Milo,

Another month has flown by and you continue to change by leaps and bounds. You pull yourself up easily and cruise around the furniture like an old pro. You've even been trying to stand on your own, letting go of things for longer and longer lengths of time.

Your vocabulary is growing. You still mostly talk in babbles but you clearly say "Daddy," although not always just when you see Daddy. Today you pointed to the Simpsons character on my t-shirt and said, "Daddy!" (Hee!) You also say "Aw-gy" when the dog comes around.  You are very consistent with that word so I'm sure you are saying "Doggy."

You make Daddy and me proud every day. While the logical part of my brain knows that you're progressing as most any child would, it doesn't stop me from thinking everything you do is special and amazing. Obviously, I'm proud and amazed that you're my child.

You have a second tooth coming in and possibly even a third. I worried for a little while that they were taking too long to come in, but according to your doctor, later is better when it comes to healthy chompers.

You spend more time actually looking at your books and playing with your toys instead of just chewing them. You interact with us and others more now, as well. At the Little Gym, you enjoy playing with the other kids. You're fascinated by the older children and the things they can do.

Even though you're going through some separation anxiety, you are fearless when it comes to trying to new things. You climb the stairs like it's the simplest thing. And you love looking into cabinets and opening drawers. We have had to babyproof in earnest.

You are eating a wider variety of foods, including lots more finger foods and even some of the things we eat. You especially like Cheerios, bread, cheese and peas.

 
Your antics and your laughter can set me to giggling like a little girl. Sometimes you will come to me for a cuddle and it melts my heart.  I never believed my heart could melt like that. I never knew I could enjoy such simple things. When you lay your head on my shoulder and slip off to sleep, I fall even further in love with you.

Sometimes it feels like you joined our lives just yesterday. Other times it feels like you've been in our lives forever. These past 10 months have been incredible -- fun and challenging and filled with love.

I love you so much, Sweetness.

Love,

Mommy

Nine months

Dear Milo,

You are 9 months old today. That means you've been in the world almost as long as you were in my tummy. You are really starting to look less like a baby and more like a little boy. And like a big boy, you're finally sleeping all the way through the night. Apparently, you just needed to be in your own room (I suspected as much, but it was hard to let you go).

You had your first Christmas this past month. You enjoyed playing with the bows and wrapping paper and you like your new toys, but the day didn't mean a whole lot to you.

Although I think our excitement of it rubbed off on you a little.

You are cruising like crazy, pulling yourself up on furniture, walls, baby gates and more. Everything is so interesting to you, and every day with you is an adventure. You have started playing hide and seek and chase with me, giggling like mad when I play peek-a-boo with you. Recently, you've decided that head butts are a great way to show your affection for Daddy and me. And you can head butt really hard. It's really cute but also really painful.

You finally got a tooth this month and you seem quite proud of it and use it on everything. You haven't bit me or Daddy but we did find chew marks on your crib and we've been giving you finger foods like freeze-dried yogurt pieces and cereal puffs. Sometimes you want to be able to feed yourself other kinds of foods, too. It's not always a huge success when you do.

But, like everything you do, it's awfully cute.

We started taking swimming lessons at the gym this month. I want you to feel comfortable in the water. And you seem to be just fine. You had fun, and being in the pool wiped you out.

I can't believe how quickly time is passing. Every moment feels so precious. Daddy and I still can't get over how much you amaze us all the time. You make us laugh so often, and every little thing about you makes us proud. We love you so much it sometimes stops us in our tracks. You are beautiful. It's hard to believe we are responsible for something as perfect as you.

 

I love you, little man. 

Love,

Mommy

8 Months

Dear Milo,

As usual, I start this letter by being amazed at how fast time flies and how much you change on a daily basis. In the past week, you have started crawling on your hands and knees and pulling yourself up on your crib, the couch, the stairs, me.

You are quite mobile and try to get into everything. We're going to be baby gate central soon.

You still refuse to sleep through the night, waking every two to three hours. So Daddy and I are having to be strong and let you fuss and cry more because we fear we've already spoiled you. Although, just yesterday, I felt a sharp little nubbin on your gums! So, I'm pretty sure you've been teething, and maybe that's what has been messing with your sleep schedule.

You're becoming quite sociable, smiling at most people and playing with the other babies at The Little Gym. You are especially taken by the little girls, but you follow one little boy around and try to do the things he does -- even though he's two months older than you.

Helping Mommy fold clothes

Your personality is really showing. You try to be so independent ... until you're not. You want to feed yourself and pick things up and do lots of things on your own. Until you get hungry or sleepy or don't want to go to bed. Then you're Mr. Clingy. And while I want you to be independent, I can't help but love your hugs.

We spent Thanksgiving in Illinois with your aunts, uncles, cousins and Grandpa. You even got to see Gramma D for a while. The drive was long and boring, but you did really well -- sometimes crying, sometimes playing quietly, napping quite a bit. It's not easy being stuck in the car, so I'm proud of how you did.

You enjoyed spending time with your cousins, and I know they enjoyed spending time with you. Even though they are a lot older than you and you won't get to grow up with them, I know they will always be there for you. They love you lots. How could they not?

Soon you will experience your first Christmas. It won't mean much to you this year, but Daddy and I are really excited to have you open presents. As for us, we already got the best gift back in April -- you. If we got nothing else, we would feel fulfilled. You are better than toys and games and sugar plums. And when you smile at us, it warms our cold, dark December nights.

I love you little man.

Love,

Mommy